Nallar Grimholdt

Age: 45
Height: 6'2
Weight: 210 Ibs
Homeland: The Far East
Sexuality: bisexual

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"Etched upon my face"
"Does my pain these eyes betray"
"His steps I retrace"My story, begins three decades prior, upon the waves of the ruby sea. I was born to a pair of poor parents who had been escaping from pirates they refused to pay in crops. Rogues upon the ruby sea that sought to steal all from them. But they were no sailors and I was a child of only 5 at the time, not understanding what had been happening. As they realized they could not escape my mother donned me in a shirt, knowing I'd learned to swim and kissed my forhead telling me she loved me and my father held us both saying the same and adding in "be strong my son, no matter what trials you face" and like that I was thrown overboard into the warm waters. In my panic I attempted to swim to catch up only to see a bomb strike the ship, and it would erupt in flames as my parents embraced one last time. I stared in stunned silence before suddenly I felt a powerful slam upon my head, and all went black.

"The Blossom falls down"
"Down it tumbles evermore"
"Yielding to Autumn"As I had awoken from my state of unconsciousness, I was greeted by the sound of flesh pounding upon flesh, bringing the grunts of someone large. My vision was blurred, but I could make out the faint image of two people. One sat down and very large, while the other brought their fist back and struck the one sitting, demanding he give him info on the treasure. I could hear no word from the large individual, so I had presumed him incapacitated, but as my eyes focused upon the large being, I realized it to be a large green kojin. His face bruised and bleeding, yet he spoke no words of retaliation. Sitting in stone and passive silence. As the pirate kept striking inevitably, he would step back, shaking his hand in pain as he grunted, "Damn Kojin and your vows of silence..." The pirate turned and saw I had awoken from my slumber. I knew not what to say, and he stormed past me as the kojins' beady eyes turned upon us as if to keep watch the man to ensure he did not harm me.My ears flatted upon my head as I was frightened. The kojin spoke, his voice deep but filled with a wisdom only age could truly bring. "Young one, are you well? They did not harm you, did they?" I would shake my head sitting there and placing a hand upon my forhead as it had a large bump upon it. Wincing in pain as the Kojin referenced his head with a finger on chained hands. "The ships hull must have struck your head, young rabbit. Do you remember the attack upon your vessel? Your name?" I'd tried to recall, my head struggling for an answer, I tried to recall my parents' faces, I tried to recall their names, but I could only recall my own. "M-my name is Nallar Grimholdt." The kojin nodded slowly and gave what seemed to be a smile."Perhaps it is best you do not recall the events... but I will make you a promise Nallar Grimholdt. My name is Sojuro, and I will get us out. One way or another. Have patience." I had no real choice truly, I was only 5 years old. I was incapable of fighting these pirates, much less freeing myself. Soon enough, the pirates returned and began to continue questioning Sojuro about some treasure. Day in and day out. As I had come to realize, the old Kojin was incredibly strong-willed. He never spoke. One day, though, they came before me and grasped both my ears in their hands. Yanking me to my feet and holding a blade to my neck, causing me to cry out as my eyes teared up in pain. "Sojuro!! Help, please!!" Id kicked for a moment pleading with sojuro to save me, and the old turtle spoke in a powerful commanding town."Nallar.. calm yourself. Breathe. And calm your mind. " I'd panicked, afraid still, and I tried but failed as I did, but sojiro was insistent. "Nallar, just trust me. Please calm your mind. Breathe in and breathe out calm." id struggle for a moment more and then listen, as I struggled id close my eyes, thinking of my parents but pushing it away with my minds eyes, the foggy image swiped away leaving naught but darkness in my mind. As I finally swept it all to the side, I felt calm and breathed despite that cold dagger against my throat. Inner peace. Sojuro smiled with a content look. And soon enough, the pirate would shake me, "Wake up, kid, come on! What in the... my god.." He looked at sojuro and pointed the blade upon him."You damn turtle, I'll kill the kid!" Sojuro looked upon the pirate and spoke very calmly. "If you truly are strong enough to claim the title of captain, perhaps you would agree to a trial by combat with me. If I lose, I'll give you the location of the Hitoshi." The pirate thought for a moment and grinned wildly, agreeing with a sick sense of excitement."Very well, you senile turtle, I accept!"I was brought upon the deck, my hands and feet bound in rope as the kojin was released from his own and brought a strange sword I'd never truly seen on the small island I'd called home. A long curved blade in a bamboo sheath to which Sojuro had unsheathed examining the blade. It was poorly kept. Rusted, old, and weathered, clearly meant as a means of ensuring the old Kojins defeat. The kojin did not seem to care, though. As if he was ready for this, prepared to take up the challenge. The pirate was brought his own similar blade but in far superior condition drawing it and holding it out with one hand as if he wielded A cutlass and the kojin simply stared in stoic silence holding his weathered blade up in two hands preparing to fight as he closed his eyes with a deep breath. Without warning, the pirate swung haphazardly with the katana, which sojuro easily sidestepped. His weathered blade glided along the pirates pristine sword as if it had not been in any poor condition. As the pair were separated, the kojin took his position up once more and held his blade up in the same way. The pirate in frustration began to strike wildly and the Kojin dodged and parried intermittently the blade sojuro wielded seemed to chip and crack upon each strike but not one blow broke it and Sojuro seemed to be patiently awaiting a precise moment. In the pirates moment of anger he cried out in rage raising his blade high above his head and sojuro saw his moment and struck with a blinding flash as he lunged forward with a speed unexpected from a Kojin and with a loud snap the katana he wielded snapped in two. For a moment of stunned silence, the pair stood amidst the crew before a trickle of blood drips down the captains head onto his shirt, and he dropped his blade and fell upon the floor, not dead but unconcious. As the crew stood in shock, sojuro would look at them "well what are you waiting for? Set sail for kugane. You're bringing me and the boy home" I stood in shock as the rest of the crew started to clean up after the fight and began working fast, the course changing as they brought us to A new direction. As I stood still in shock, I'd shake my head slowly, and sojuro came beside me, placing one of his large leathery hands upon my small head. "Come, Nallar, let us relax in the captains room. I believe we have Earned that" I'd followed him willingly. Curious as to one thing, "How.... how do you fight like that?" The old kojin chuckled and smiled at my naivette. "Do you wish to learn young one?" Id nod excitedly and smile widely at him, my ears flapping happily as he pats my head. As of that moment, I would become Sojuros pupil.

The next 13 years of my life would have been spent in Sojuros care. Training day in, day out. Whether in kugane or in tamamizu. My life was spent training, learning the ways of the samurai as well as the Kojin, and over time, I saw sojuro as a father figure to me. After I'd hurt myself, he'd bandage me. After a long day of training, he would bring me onigiri or other things. He even taught me to cook such things. It was tough, but by my 18th year, I had become a master samurai given the name Master Grimholdt, and soon I was informed of master sojuros passing. As I lay by his side, he said his final words "My boy, you have been a blessing to this old Kojin, you were as my own son, and I could not be more proud of you." I held his hands in my own, my thin hands calloused and strong from the years of swordsmanship. "The leaf falls downward, fluttering every which way, yet still falls near home" i would tell him and with a faint smile the kojin weakly reached over to his bedside and pulled forth a wrapped blade "as you may recall years ago when we met the pirates you fought sought a treasure... one I named Hitoshi, as you know i never allowed them access... for i was saving it for my own son once upon a time. A sword of ancient magic passed down in my family." He placed the blade in my weary hands and closed his eyes."I wish for you to have it, Nallar, for you are my legacy. My own son... thought not of blood... please.. take care of it. " As he said this, I knew he was leaving this plane, and I wept, my eyes dripping tears down upon my Haori. As we sat there, sojuros eyes closed in peace and forever slept. I sobbed and choked. My breath was short as I spoke a haiku I dedicate to his memory. "Though once a stranger, the father you have become, the father I chose" I'd break under the grief As they took his body to be set upon with their ritual for the deceased. As I stood I would be in a state of numbness, it felt like a piece of who I was had left me.For days, I walked along the roads of Kugane, going all over the land when by my 20th year i would happened upon a village beset by pirates. I sought to aid them in their moments of need. As I rushed to aid some of the many citizens fleeing inwoukd find a young man, perhaps only 18 at the time trapped beneath a building being beset upon by a group of pirates, claiming they were going to "end the freak" Knowing not what this was about I jumped in to intervene as the young feminine faced male Hyur laid there gasping and holding his sides. I called forth to them my hand upon my tsuka prepared for anything to come. "Step away from the boy" as the pirates grinned they'd raise their blades "we got ourselves a sympathizer to freaks lads" they'd all charged and just as master sojuro had taught me, I drew forth my katana as Two came close in quick succession i woukd strike out at them as they passed by me, leaned forward as my blade is held off to my right side, but as the pair fell to the ground I would stand and breathe out my nose, my muscles relaxing as my blade went back to rest position and my violet eyes gazing upon the last 3 in determined fury "come then, if it is blood you wish spilled I'll oblige you" the other two dropped their blades and ran away, to afraid to risk themselves leaving only the largest of them. He held a katana himself. One uncared for, oiled yet not shined, it's onset of rust inevitable. As I breathed deep, I cleared my mind and sheathed my blade but kept my hand upon the Tsuka, awaiting a decisive blow. He charged and swung towards me, and with a single dashing thrust where I brought my sword up and outward, i struck. I would stand still as did he, Mere feet from the hyur nearby. And as I did, the pirate fell, to his knees then to the ground. "In death you may walk, hunting riches ever lost, in death you shan't rest" id sheath my blade and kneel before the hyur as the rest of the pirates fled with their plunder but many more safe feom their onslaught "come... we must leave this place" id smile and the boys soft blue eyes looked Into my own filled with gratitude, he was shorter than I, his hair a bright golden blonde like a sunset and as we stood he would hug my chest and i would laugh softly petting his head.I would come to discover his name was Kieran, his parents had been in one of the many housees when they lit on fire as they slept, only he was able to escape and he lost them. In that moment, I felt the sadness over sojuros loss dissipate. I felt someone could fully understand me and my pain. Over the years, me and Kieran became closer. I would come to find out he himself was called freak as he did not have feelings towards women and felt himself attracted to men. A feeling.. I had shared myself, though I've no idea what drove it. I felt safe confiding in Kieran. Within a year, we had become lovers. Our love and passion flourishing in peace. unfortunately, the good times did not last. By my 27th year, while me and Kieran had camped upon the night stars, our camp was attacked. The pirates from those years ago had returned, and the man I thought I'd sent to oblivion had returned and sought revenge. They incapacitated me in my bare state and stole Kieran. Demanding, I face him in one on one combat. I knew my skills, and I agreed.
I stood donned only in my small clothes. My blade held in my hands the hitoshi gleamed and glimmered in the pale moonlight. As the fight began I tried to counter but as I did a pirate alongside the leader threw a rock upon me, breaking my concentration, and as he did my guard dropped and I felt the feeling of cold steel sink into the flesh of my shoulder, Causing me to reel back in pain as blood poured down my body. I'd try again ignoring the pain as the pirate leader struck at my left thigh and as I prepared a counter another rock struck my temple dazing me as I felt the sword stab my thigh sending me to my knee and forcing me to drop my blade as I did. I held my shoulder and tried to stand, but my tendon had been sliced. As I focused, I saw the pirate raising my own hitoshi, bringing it down to my chest as I stood and saw my life flash before my eyes. All i had done. Sojuro, my parents then.... Kieran. But it wasn't a flash of memory. As I heard the sickening sound of flesh being pierced. as I saw red coat my face, a blade inches from my eyes but not making contact... as Kieran stood above me... his body pierced by hitoshi and bleeding. My heart sank, I felt in shock as I watched him turn his face and smile at me and mouth the words, "I love you." He fell to the floor with a sickening splat with hitoshi in his chest still, I knelt beside him. Tears in my eyes as I tried to form the words. Tried to speak as his lifeless body lay at my feet. And as I placed a hand upon his cheek. I sobbed and my hands trembled. In the pale light Hitoshis blade hissed and glowed. Its blade imbued a pink color as I carefully removed the sword and laid kieran down in a paceful position so he might rest. In that moment something rose within me. I felt only one thing. Rage. Hatred. Murderous malice. I woukd pick up the now glowing hitoshi and turn upon the pirates. Slowly walking towards the leader as he got smug. "What you upset about your dead freak lover? People like you shouldn't live regardless. You're just a bunch of Fa -" I didn't let him finish. Even as he raised his blade, it was too late. My motion wasn't even noticeable and was silent. As his head rolled from his shoulders in a spray of blood that coated my body more and I turned to the other pirates. They tried to fend me off to disrupt my concentration. But this was no longer focus i used. This was rage. Hatred. And every rock hit with no effect. And I slaughtered them all. Blood staining the ground red. As I finished... I would walk to Kierans corpse and kneel beside him. Another one. Another person I loved. Taken. In anguish, I cried out to the heavens, forsaking them for all they had done. Damning the gods as tears and rain poured upon my face, washing the blood as tears stained my cheeks. Despite it being clear skies, the rain fell... a fox's wedding. Hitoshi lay at my side. In that time, I would cremate kieran on a traditional pyre. Wearing his necklace upon my neck, I would walk, leaving behind all that I once was.

For the next decade or so, I would explore the legends of the Hitoshi. To understand it all. To learn if perhaps maybe Kierans soul may have been spared. I yielded nothing for years. I lost sleep in the wake of his death. I never grew attached to another soul. As I kept my travels lasting, I met a myriad of people and visited all of Eorzea. Everywhere. But nothing came to light and by my 37th year I had given up hope.Soon though, I'd find Sojuros distant relations who pointed me to a legendary Smithy who was said to forge the Hitoshi. I found him by chance. Though it was not simple. For he himself had been beset by garleans. He needed my aid, and I yielded it. Killing them with hitoshi. I had never anticipated that they may have taken over kugane as they had, but unfortunately, I was forced to witness it over time. I had begun to notice in the last few years since kierans death that my katana had not been cutting cleaner as it once had. I believed perhaps in his death, my skills had simply faltered from grief. Yet I did not know. As I approached the freshly saved Tsugumo, he spoke in a very wise way and looked upon me with eyes piercing and knowing. "Soguros apprentice.. and his adopted son, I believe." I would nod solemnly, not speaking as much as I once had, and he would make an agreeing sound and spoke plainly. "You seek to know the nature of hitoshi." I'd again nod in agreement. The old kojin held his large hand out, to which I handed him hitoshi a bit hesitantly. I felt as if the blade had been part of Kieran now. Like letting go of it was letting go of Kieran. He held it in his hands and looked upon me with disdain. "You're troubled, lad. You're grief, your pain, it's taken you heavilly has it not?" Id nod and look down."The blade is damaged from my unskillful cuts then..?" The kojin struck me with hitoshis hilt. "No... you sod for brain, the spirit within it grieves for you and is frustrated at you!" I would blink in shock, taken aback by Tsugumos words and blink "s-spirit???" The kojin struck me again, and I'd yelp out and tear up a bit from the pain "yes The spirit, the spirit of someone the blade was attached to. Or you. You see, this blade is a powerful one. If someone should fall by the blade who was bound too the wielder, wether by betrayal or loss or accidents the blade will absorb their being and form a spirit" id shake my head and blink "so then.. Kieran is.." I felt so lifted and happy "th-then Kieran is -" The kojin held a hand up to stop me suddenly, "he was there. Still is to a degree.. but all the grief, the anger you felt, it has truly altered his spirit, forming it into an entity of rage, I reckon only reconciliation between you two can fix it." I'd blink as the old kojin returned hitoshi, and I looked at him. "reconcilliation?" He nodded amd crossed his arms to me "yes lad, apologize to him and make amends to him for sinking into grief for his sacrifice, remember that those we love do what they do for us because we love them, not for gain." I would look at the blade and tear up some. "How... how can I call him to apologize for these past years?" The kojin marked my map at the right spot and smiled."Once you've found some form of inner balance, go Here. Then call his true name and his spirit shall appear but you'll have a fight on your hands" i'd nod and grip hitoshi firmly "thank you tsugumo" he grunted and looked at me with no expression "Sojuro loved you you know, after his son passed away had no one. Much like you now. Until he found you. I'd never seen him so happy. " he smiled and turned back to his previous work, and I'd leave.

As I approached the cliff. I saw the moon rise in the distance. I'd kneel before the edge of the cliff and bow, closing my eyes in shame as I sighed and thought deeply, clearing the pain, clearing my heart clearing my soul as Sojuro taught me. I would speak quietly and shakilly into the night "Kieran Ichuro". The went night silent even the cicadas had silenced before I felt the ominous presence of malice. Anger. Hate. I would raise my head up and see it. The form of his spirit, a raging 9 tailed fox of white and pink energy as it growled at me, anger flashing as it stood there and I'd pick up hitoshi knowing what was coming. As I stood ready, I'd clear my heart and mind. I would smile at the spirit, tears streaking down my face as I waited and felt my eyes burn, but my heart was ever resolute. "I'm sorry, Kieran... I shouldn't have let my grief guide my hand. It's all my fault. Come. Take it out on me. Please." And with a flash of white he charged, I blocked and yet was knocked away, each strike unrelenting and unyielding. I tried to defend, but I felt myself faltering, each powerful strike making my body shake, I felt my determination wane. I kept trying again and again, but my arms were yielding to the strength. Yet soon... I felt something, like a voice... soft and powerful in me. Sojuro spoke to me, "Son... fight back, your footwork is fine, but your heart is not resolute! Stand firm and steady no matter the foe!" I would feel my feet dig in their heels, my strength growing as I started to block and avoid Kierans spirit strikes, the nine tails growing less overwhelming with its hate. As I proceeded to keep blocking i would get nicked on my arm causing blood to flow and I heard another voice "stay strong son, no matter the trials" I would grit my teeth and keep blocking and dodging now, striking back at the nine tails desperately seeking a songle opening for a strike. Once more As I started to push back the foxes assault a voice rang out in my heart "Hey Nall, no matter what may come toward us, wether one of us passes or something remember, always live on, keep pushing forward... you taught me that!" Kierans words to me. Lost in my grief returned to me now as I found my desire to live once more. I felt my passion and my determination ignite. I cried out as my blade struck upon the foxes chest. "I'M SORRY KIERAN I'LL NEVER FORGET AGAIN!" And with the most powerful cut I'd ever done, I struck the fox, and hitoshis blade snapped in two. Flinging to the side as I stood there, huffing in the aftermath as I panted and fell to my knees. As the nine tailed fox softly padded in front of me and looked at me. Kierans voice filling my head as the fox was now passive. "That's right, Nall, you should never give up, because even if I'm gone, I always loved you, and it's not the end I will always wait to see you in the end." The fox smiled, and I would break down crying and holding the fox's neck, crying out that I loved him So much. Kieran was still with me now, freed from hitoshi as a nine tailed fox. As the sun rose, I would climb upon his back, and he flew me off to kugane.As the years went by, we had come to terms with this. Kieran was him, but he had stated I could always find a lover so long as he approved of them. Often, he would hide within a new pendant I had purchased, and I had a new blade commissioned for myself. Hitoshi I laud upon Saguros grave marker. And thanked him for all he did. Now... I travel onwards unto new horizons. Finally, I found peace in my own soul after so many years."For even the end"
"Sad though it may seem to you"
"is but the first step"